What do you do?
You have one friend bashing another but all of the people involved are really close to you. Do you stick up for the friend that is being talked down, even though he is not around? Even though the consequences could end up with the person who is closest to you being very upset with you and possibly making it so you can’t see your friend?
I’ve learned something over the past few months. Especially for a friend you should show up whether they are there or not regardless of the people around you, friends are supposed to build each other up and if you don’t stop the rumors and correct what people think about that person you aren’t building them up. In fact you are basically handing people a wrecking ball and saying “Have fun!” If you are allowing others to rip down your friend, how can you be considered their friend? Would they appreciate it more if you put their relationship on the line to defend them? I don’t know, I should’ve asked and maybe later I will. But I look at it like this, if you put the relationship at risk to defend them, how much more would they appreciate it if the friendship continued afterwards? That would be a friendship I would value.
Recently whether either situation has to do with that or not I don’t know, but what I do know is that it has shown me how important it is to stick up for someone. Simply sticking up for them or even someone you don’t know, could save a life, a job, even a friendship.
It is funny to me because I have a friend who is always telling me that if any guy messes with me he will be on their doorstep with a gun. It makes me feel good, not in a ooy-gooy way of “aww.. he loves me.” But the fact that he cares enough that whether the guy is abusive or not, he is willing to put his life on the line to defend me. I pretty much know that if I called him at 3 a.m. in the morning and told him that I was in trouble he would hunt me down and then take out whoever is messing with me.
To give someone that feeling that they are important enough for someone to defend… It changes perspective, and unless you are really good friends you don’t know exactly what that person is going through. So even having one person stand up for them can make a difference…
It’s good to know that you have a friend who will build you up and not allow others to disrespect you. Be that friend who is willing to stand up for your friends, regardless of who is watching, who is talking about them, especially if you know that is not who that person is. If you can’t stand up and defend a friend how are you going to defend what you believe in?