Do You Have To Be Yelled At?

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 My horse is absolutely amazing! We do liberty work like this all the time. I even ride him like this.

Anyway, I keep getting in trouble this month. I got slapped with a frying pan this week (metaphorically). It really has been an interesting month as far as my walk with God goes. 

I was in church and we were doing worship and I had this thought pop into my head I should go do this. I argued with myself because I didn’t want to do it and end up being a disruption or have people think I was some weirdo. So I didn’t do it and I regretted it later. Well a few weeks went by and I started asking peoples opinions and started praying on it and the urge to do it became stronger and stronger but in all reality I couldn’t just simply go do it. So I asked permission to do it and I basically got told no, unless… I told God, “ok, if this is You, let x,y, and z happen.” It was funny as I watched things just slip into place in the matter of about an hour and God went above and beyond what I had requested. It was way to obvious that I was suppose to do it and I did. Finally, after almost 4 weeks of contemplating it.

Then, this last Monday I was playing guitar and yet another thought came to mind. I should ask if I can do this. WELL…. Lets just say, I would rather be thrown from a horse before I do this. Most people would say I’m crazy and plenty would prefer to do this rather than be thrown from a horse. Anyway, I told God immediately “If You REALLY want me to do this you better have this person show up at church Wednesday.”

….. They were there…. *uhg*… Once more “GOD! If this is You make this person come talk to me.” Upon finishing that I got, “You say you want to be so close to Me that you can feel my Breath, feel My heart, and hear My whisper and yet! Every time I speak to you, you want me to yell at you. How do you expect to hear My whisper when all you want Me to do is yell?” I just got slapped with a frying pan (Frying Pans! Who knew, right?).

…. oops. Sorry God.

And this, is my lesson.

You see, my horse is always looking for small commands. My goal is to eventually get him so sensitive that no one will see my commands. Lately I’ve been working on getting him to go where I want him to go simply by looking in that direction. When I first began working with him he all he knew was that I had to pull on the left or right rein to go the way I wanted. I then taught him that if I push with the left leg I want him to go right and if I push with the right leg I want him to go left. If I shift my weight forwards he will go straight unless I am asking him to turn in the process. So I now no longer need anything on his head. However you can still see that I am using my legs to maneuver him. Now my goal is to be able to look in the direction I want him to go and have him go that way. When that is accomplished no one will notice how I am turning him.

My horse is only as sensitive as my lightest command. That’s kind of how it is with God. If we are always expecting Him to yell at us we will never hear Him whisper. Chester is really good about reading my body language and some times when he’s on top of his game he can nearly predict what I am going to ask of him. That’s when it becomes a beautiful dance between the horse and the person. That is how I want to be with God. I want to be able to come close to predicting what He wants me to do. I want to so badly to be in one with God, to be that beautiful dance between the two of us. I need to learn to listen when God is whispering, when he’s simply talking. This is my challenge for myself and anyone willing to accept it. Learn to hear God’s whispers and great things will happen.

God Bless,

Jessica