6 Reasons To Laugh

Smiles and laughter go hand in hand…  They are contagious and way too much fun! So here are a few facts about laughing to get us started.

  1. Laughter lowers blood pressure, therefore making you less vulnerable to heart attacks.
  2. It reduces stress hormones like cortisol and epinephrine,  leaving your body relaxed for at least 45 minutes after a good bout of laughter.
  3. It also releases endorphins that help to lessen the amount of pain you are in.
  4. Laughter has shown an increase in levels of salivary immunoglobulin, which is an important antibody that fights bacterial and viral infections.
  5. Laughing can improve sleep, digestion problems, and cause more optimistic feelings.
  6. People who laugh together tend to have longer lasting relationships and feel more satisfied with their relationship.

Now something that I found humorous is that women laugh more than men (which isn’t surprising..) BUT men have the tendency to want prompt laughter.

So, there are many reasons to laugh.  The reason I had to go find all this was because I’ve been feeling happier and I have been sleeping a lot better lately, I think, due to late night conversations that generally have me shaking or rolling with uncontrollable fits of laughter.. I mean, we just had a conversation last night about me dying from laughing.. Physically and emotionally I FEEL a difference, I’m not as tired, I’m perky, and I actually have some energy to burn!

Anyway, if the general joyous feeling isn’t enough to keep a person laughing I have given you 6 other reasons to laugh more! Now I’ll say, sure, sometimes mustering up the energy to laugh or even feel happy is a chore some days.. But boy, if you find someone who can help you out with that, you’ll look forward to that, because you know it will be fun. Even if you cover more serious topics, and don’t always get around to the goofy happy stuff, you’ll find that if you can laugh a little more, you’ll feel tons better! It’s good to have friendships that give emotional support as well as allowing the two of you to keep each other’s spirits lifted.

It’s kind of funny because I’m finding I’m more willing to let people see my goofy side, and not take myself quite so seriously… It is nice, I don’t feel as tense all the time.

Seriously though, before getting uptight over something just consider, is it really worth getting uptight over? Or can you find the humor in it? And also ask yourself, who’s day can I make better by spreading the smiles, you’ll find that it will make you feel better when you can make another person laugh, even if they are a stranger…

Just remember, not everything is “The Worst”. The link below is a bit done by a comedian named Tim Hawkins. Watch it and have a laugh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WMrefP098o

God Bless,

Jessica

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Relationships

I have had the privilege of talking to a young man who I think, is a good friend in the making. Somehow, in our long novel like conversations we started talking about relationships and yeah… It was weird for me… little awkward.. But it was interesting, because I misspoke or something and he misunderstood and it just kept spiraling down from there. However I actually had to think about some things, things that I’ve thought of before, but didn’t think of like that.

With society the way it is today, nearly everyone is sleeping with or has slept with someone before marriage. But bear with me, society says it isn’t ok to be single and it is flat out weird to not have slept with at least one person in your teenage years. Shoot I went to walmart today wearing a shirt that says “Got my dog, got my horse, don’t need no cowboy” and the cashier rattled it off and promptly laughed, “You have a cowboy though don’t you?” “No ma’am, I’m not interested in that right now. I’ve got my 3 horses and I am good to go.” She laughed again, “Aww. You’ll find one.” She continued with her attempts to uhm…. encourage? me? All the while I’m going I’M NOT INTERESTED LADY!! I DON’T NEED THAT HEADACHE RIGHT NOW!! I will say though there are several people who think that I should have a boyfriend already, again with the walmart trip, three separate people read my shirt and then were astonished that I do not have a boyfriend.

You see though, this idea made me stop and think, as young adults when are we truly ready for a relationship? Because some times I think I might be ready and other times I know I’m not ready. So what needs to be considered?

1. How do you feel about the opposite sex? Me personally, it is a big red flag that says “HEY! You don’t trust men.” I don’t much trust anyone, but I definitely shouldn’t be considering getting into a deeper relationship with someone I have a hard time trusting.

You can dislike the opposite sex and still feel compelled to have a relationship. Trust me, I know…. Some times it is peer pressure that pushes that desire for a relationship. However for me, I don’t really know how to explain it other than, I don’t trust most guys, but for a long time the only thing I wanted was to feel accepted by a man (it seems like a stupid idea now..). Not just any guy, I wanted a mentor. Occasionally, I got the two feelings mixed up and that was when I wanted a boyfriend. Now days though, I think it is peer pressure, I have a friend who is married and pregnant (which I have no desire to have children.. Unless I am adopting.), and another who is getting married, and an aunt who is a few years older than I am, who is also getting married, and everyone around me has boyfriends. It’s crazy! Then when you tell someone you don’t have a boyfriend and they are like, “Seriously? What’s wrong with you?” It messes with your head! Generally though I am perfectly content being single and getting to do what I want to do, when I want to do it, and not having to worry about someone else. I do believe though that not switching boyfriends every time I turn around has benefitted me in the long run by saving me from many broken hearts and even possibly a crummy marriage later down the road.

2. What does the other person want? Are they jumping right into bed? Or are they being thoughtful and considerate? If they are trying to uhm… get you in bed, before marriage. Then you are not likely to have a strong foundation to build off of.

Just like a house, you have to lay the foundations first before doing anything else. Get to know each other, understand each other. Learn each other’s strengths, weakness, flaws, and perfections. As the relationship progresses THEN you can begin to get more physical IF BOTH parties are game. When I say physical I mean without sex. Hugging, cuddling, maybe a peck on the cheek or whatever. I myself don’t think lip to lip kissing should come until after marriage, however it isn’t something that I think is a huge deal I suppose… Though without a doubt, sex, should be saved until after marriage. A relationship cannot be built off of sex and will often be the end of a relationship before it gets started. Not only that but it puts you at risk of pregnancy before you are married. Most people will say, “Aww, he loves me. He wouldn’t leave me.” But really is that a chance you are willing to take? Plus, I would like to hope there are people out there that still value virginity and would be proud to say, I saved my virginity for my spouse. I personally have a two year mark before deciding whether someone is dating material. If they can stay loyal on the off chance that things might work out, you’ve probably got yourself a winner. Be my friend, if we can start there and you are willing to do whatever it takes (within reason) to keep me in your grasps, then we’ll talk.
3. Are you willing to make the changes necessary to accommodate your girlfriend/boyfriend?

Yes, changes will come. You will have to take time out of whatever lifestyle you live to learn the lifestyle of your possibly future wife/husband. On the same note, they shouldn’t expect you to drop everything you are doing expecting your world to revolve around them (I mean, it should, in a way, but..). In fact, they should also be taking an interest in your hobbies. Because I’m sorry, I don’t care what you enjoy there is always some interest that can be shown even if it is only verbal. Not only that but the other person will want you to go do things with them, that means that you will actually have to set aside time to hangout or whatever it is couples do these days that don’t involve sleeping together.

4. Does the idea of a relationship make you nervous? Or maybe even scare you? Because if it does, you may not be ready.

I’ll admit, the idea of a relationship scares me periodically. Allowing someone that close to me just seems like a bad idea. Even the young man I’m talking to, he has made a couple of statements that shouldn’t bother me. But I see we are rapidly bonding as friends and I have had to voice it to him that it kind of makes me uncomfortable. It’s funny though because he’s so laid back about it and is willing to allow me to work through what I need to, and THAT is just a platonic friendship that is making me squirm. I can honestly say, if you date/marry a person who is afraid to let you love them and wants to keep their distance it is going to be challenging at best to make the relationship work. Which is why time before getting more heavily involved is a good thing. Because to start with you may not know what you are getting into until several months or a year down the road.

Some times though, the uncomfortable feeling can be caused by fearing what will happen once you are in a relationship, fearing not being good enough, or the relationship not working out. There are a number of reasons and which one is for you to find out.

5. What are the reasons for wanting a boyfriend/girlfriend? THAT is a big one.

You see, it is important to know why you or the person you are considering dating want to be in a relationship. Peer Pressure, sex, age, these are not reasons to be in a relationship. The other thing that needs to be watched for is, are you only looking for someone to care about you? Or do you genuinely want to care about that person too? As a young adult, and younger, are you really looking for a boyfriend/girlfriend? Or are you looking for a mentor or close friend? In my case I wanted a mentor, but would get boyfriend and mentor mixed up momentarily until I got to the root of the problem and realized that I needed a mentor.

So anyway, those are just a few of many thing that need to be considered when you are looking to enter a relationship. Some of it can be hard to swallow for some, but I really would like to see a time where more girls are being treated like ladies and the ladies are able to treat the men as men. If everyone would have a respect for each other before getting overly involved I think we would have a few more successful marriages. If you spend a few years getting to know each other, there is less likely to be a divorce because someone is being abused or cheated on or what have you.

I’m here to tell you though, no matter what anyone else says, you do not HAVE to have a boyfriend/girlfriend. It is perfectly alright and smart to wait if that is what you need/want to do.

And one other thing. If you do have a boyfriend/girlfriend, don’t uproot and move to some unfamiliar place where you might end up stranded because suddenly your partner has decided that y’all relationship isn’t going to work. I mean, overall, consider the choices you make before marriage and consider how they will effect you if the other decides he/she is done with the relationship.

 

Anyhow,

God Bless,

Jessica

Friends

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Have you ever felt invisible? It is something I very much would love to accomplish most days, but some days I just wish someone would notice. And not just anyone, but someone similar to me, someone who enjoys the same things, shares in my sense of humor, and knows how to simply be a friend. No, I’m not talking about boyfriends or girlfriends, I’m talking a Friend, a person to lean on, who has a decent head on their shoulders that you trust to not lead you into trouble. Someone that when I say, “Hey, you want to go trail riding?” or running, or hiking, or pull out the guitars, or shooting, or whatever. They will be ready to go. Obviously, everyone has a life so it wouldn’t be all the time, but come on, at least once or twice a month!

I have never been good at making friends, I tried once, recently actually, and it failed. They said they were interested in being friends, however, not so much…

I have two people that I talk to on a regular basis, then I have one who claims to be my friend but refuses to speak to me, and another who is a friend but he has a life, friends who are closer to his age, and so we talk and see each other occasionally. But nothing more really.

There is also a girl I am trying to figure out, she has some crap she’s dealing with and I can see she needs a friend who is not a trouble maker, and has a level head on their shoulders but still knows how to have fun, and I swear she sees right through me despite my attempts to get her to notice me. Sure we talk, but she has yet to actually, “take the bait” so to speak.

I have been in contact with so many people and no one cares to be around me and I don’t understand it! Mom says it’s because I’m too good. I won’t go getting into trouble… -_-

Keep in mind I’m really not complaining. Here’s why.

I can’t find anyone I want to be around. I out man all the boys, I like being outside, and to the boys, 70 degrees is either way to hot, or way too cold. And yes, the boys are afraid of a little horsey poo and dirt. It’s disturbing to me. Or they go the other direction and they cuss up a storm, sleep with everything that is woman, or drinks to an oblivion. However, I find that there are more guys that I can talk to better than girls because girls are just…. Drama… Boyfriend dumped me, I need a boyfriend, everyone must hate me because I don’t have a boyfriend. Do I look good? Is my makeup ok? Is my butt too big? Does this make me look fat? Oh. My. Gosh….. Just make it stop… Find a ratty holey t-shirt and a pair of jeans and shoes that are comfy and get on with life. I promise I am not poking fun at anyone, I just don’t understand it. I’m 19 going on 20 this February and I have yet to have a boyfriend, I have never worn makeup and my outfits consist of beat up T’s or tank tops, with either yoga pants or jeans and a pair of dirty worn down boots.

But you see, I think this is what society is missing, it is missing friends. Young people don’t know how to just be friends, they are either in a relationship or they are acquaintances. See to me, a friend is someone that you can count on, someone that is there for you physically, and emotionally. Someone who is going to tell you when you are being stupid and help you when you need it. Again, I understand people have lives but seriously, everyone should have at least one GOOD friend, rather than 100 acquaintances. However, there are very few people that can keep up with someone who wants to hang out outdoors and even fewer who want to be that pillar to lean on when all heck breaks loose in the other person’s world.

The other factor is knowing why they are there for you too, because now days they may be there for you only to take it and turn it into gossip for the whole freaking world. I was in that situation once, where I had no one to talk to really besides my mom and so I turned to another teenager who had been through the same situation with this same person and in a week the information I had given her was spread through my church.

My  mom wants me to get out and do something with people I just can’t find anyone that doesn’t want to go hangout at a mall or sit around a room. I want someone that I can go hiking or riding with. I don’t want to sit in front of a t.v. or watch them surf facebook from their phone.. THIS IS WHY I DON’T HAVE FRIENDS!!!!!! I’m high maintenance… I really am.

I try to appease to my friends’ needs, but some times I want to get out and get covered in dirt or shoot something! Which is why I want a bow now, because I can’t use mom’s glock at free will, plus you have to buy ammo where the bow you can just go get your arrows…. Although, I just found out in the state of Texas I am old enough to get a firearm, that makes me happy!

So all this to say, consider expanding your territory. Do something different, something new, be a friend before being a boyfriend or girlfriend. When you can accomplish being a friend, which no, doesn’t necessarily mean being outside all the time, you pretty much have it made. Some of the best relationships come from friendships if both parties know how to be friends.

With all the peer pressure young people face, it is time to go back to the basics. If you can’t have a friendship, you won’t be able to have a happy marriage. And honestly the outdoors is more likely to bring people closer together than a videogame console or a phone with internet or a t.v. It’s just my personal opinion for whatever it’s worth.

OH OH OH! And that’s the other thing, I was about to shut up. Not anymore…

Friends are suppose to build each other up! Not greet each other with, “Hey B**** how’s it goin?” It’s just not right! I see it everywhere! Especially with teens and young adults, they call each other every curse word in the book some days, and I don’t understand it. It’s not cute, or funny. It may not feel like it’s a big deal, but there is a part of you deep down that is affected and it will eventually come out even if you don’t realize it.

Okay, I’m done now…

God Bless,

Jessica