My View on Carrying

One of these days I may have to do an in depth article on this just for grins and giggles but for now, I’m just going to do a brief article on the various incidents that I know of this year…

Walmart 15 minutes away from me: A young lady was held at gunpoint during an attempted abduction.

Walmart 25 minutes away from me: An employee stabbed and killed another employee and then stabbed a fireman in the throat.

There’s been a handful of escaped convicts, a few of those that were convicted of murder.

There was a 5 time serial rapist who was not only beating the women, but also doused one in gasoline and lit her on fire.

There’s a school near me, that has the highest rape rate in the state of Texas…

A mother, wife, and Sunday school teacher was murdered in her own church…

A man decided to rob a waffle house with a freaking AK-47…

There was a drive by shooting not too long ago…

There’s been NUMEROUS warnings put out by our city and police department that there is a certain vehicle trying to pick up small children…

I was sexually harassed by a friend of mines’ dad who I was starting to come around to thinking he would make a good mentor until…

The list can go on and on… I made the decision about a year ago that before I got a handgun I wanted to learn a martial art. So I picked up Boxing, Jiu-Jitsu and Muay Thai and gave Krav Maga a shot which I think I will continue with here in the next couple months…

I knew that when the time came for my handgun, one, I wanted multiple ways to solve a situation, two, I wanted a way to protect my handgun, and three, I knew that handgun would become like my cell phone. I knew I would want it on me at all times if possible.

Now what I think is funny is the flack that I am getting for that mindset. “You know the boogie man isn’t going to jump out and get you right?” or “Don’t you think you’re going overboard?” Yeah, tell that to me a few years ago when I went to my FRIENDS house that should’ve been perfectly safe… I can only imagine what would’ve happened if I was so naïve as to have gone into his bedroom when he coaxed me to do so…

Tell that to the woman who was going home from working her shift at Walmart and got held at gunpoint. Or the Fireman who got stabbed while he was out shopping… Or the family who’s house was broken into. Or maybe try telling that to the 5 dead in the Burlington mall shooting this past week… I mean, why do you think people are screaming gun control? Because as of late, there’s been a whole lot of messed up people out there… Between the Black Lives Matter protests and the seemingly increasing number of terrorist attacks, it’s only getting worse…

So here’s the thing… Those of us who want to carry and/or do carry EVERYWHERE we go, as long as it’s legal, those of us who are responsible and well trained, we aren’t carrying out of paranoia, fear, or anything of the sort. We carry because we want to provide as much protection as possible to ourselves, or family and friends, and the strangers we don’t know. We carry because of a commitment we’ve made to ourselves and those around us. When we have that firearm we have a duty to do whatever possible to keep those around us safe. Doesn’t matter who it is, if it’s an officer, a black person, a white person, a Christian, a Muslim… If they’ve got a heart and they are an innocent bystander…

We carry for the better safe than sorry concept. Not the “S***, I can’t get to my gun!” Moment or the moment of helplessness as you have no good way to take action. Yes, Martial Arts are GREAT, learning to disarm someone is GREAT, but it only works in close quarters… Not everyone can be a Neo or a Trinity… Just sayin… If a guy has a knife or a gun, you aren’t as likely to get close enough to fight hand to hand… Not impossible, but not likely…

I know with me, I would want to carry at home because I tend to be forgetful, if I leave home I don’t want to forget my firearm or if I need to leave in a hurry. Am I really concerned about something happening at home? No… But… I can’t forget it if it’s on me… Plus, per chance something DOES happen at home, what good is it going to do if it’s in a lock box? Someone breaks into the house and holds a gun to you, “Hang on one moment please sir… I have to go grab my key and get my firearm out of the safe…” “Oh sure, let me just lay my gun down, can I have a drink while you get your gun?” NO!! That’s NOT how that’s going to work!

Obviously, I can’t speak for everyone who carries… Shoot, I was just talking to someone last week who said the reason they got their CCL was because it was “cool.” But I think for the majority of those who are responsible and have training, I think I can speak on their behalf by saying, we have a right and a duty to defend ourselves, our family/friends and those around us… We don’t carry in fear or paranoia, instead we carry for prevention, precaution, for that just in case moment…

Paranoia and Precaution are two totally different things… Doubt me? Grab a dictionary… You can have Precaution without fear…

Anyway, I’ll step off my soapbox now…

God Bless,

Stay safe,

Jessica

 

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Rantings of a Tomboy

Me dressing up and getting “girly” is probably an overly sensitive subject for me. Usually… No, all the time, if and when I decide to get “girly” it consists of some well-loved boots, muddy or dusty, a good pair of jeans and a nice top and when I say nice, I’ve got a few lacey tops that are actually what people could describe as cute…

Otherwise, I don’t wear makeup, I don’t wear dresses, I don’t wear skirts or anything terribly frilly including jewelry… And I hate feeling forced to wear that crap.

I think though that it’s funny that we live in a society in which we are trying to get people to be happy with their bodies, trying to get people to have boundaries and whatnot. However, we like to put people in situations in which they are expected to “look nice” as if they don’t look nice without being all frilly. Without the makeup, without the stupid manicures and crap and then, if it’s a family event, we want to pull the “You’re supposed to care about me” card. WHICH if you do manage to guilt that person into doing it, we’ve done a few things here,

1. We’ve essentially told them they don’t look nice enough without getting all frilly.
2. We completely disrespect that persons boundaries and wishes because it’s their body and we want to guilt them into doing what we want because we have a certain expectation of how they should look.

Me, I personally absolutely detest the way I look with makeup. I hate it. It’s not just that I don’t like putting on makeup, it is more that I really just hate the way I look with makeup on. I’m perfectly happy with how I look. And the one flaw that I do have with my skin, is my consistent picking when I get stressed and scratching skin open and eventually scarring… And I’m sorry, ain’t no amount of makeup gonna hide a big freaking scab on your face or arm or chest or back… It just ain’t. Not without looking worse. SO, the one feature that I don’t like about myself, isn’t going to be fixed with makeup. Otherwise, I love the way I look. I just hate the way I look with makeup.

I’m coming to the conclusion that for some stupid reason in some cases girls are required to wear dresses… Ok… Whatever, I don’t like dresses because they are stereotyped for the most part and suddenly you become this delicate little flower that can’t handle her own… Or, it catches unnecessary attention… I don’t like feeling forced to wear a dress, but I’m coming to the conclusion I may have to deal with that fact of life…

All the other crap just adds onto the insanity when you are asking a girl like me to get “girly”. Jewelry, nails… It’s just more crap added to it. It’s one thing to ask someone to dress a certain way, but when you are asking them to add makeup, or do their nails or whatever, really? Is it really necessary? Is however they feel comfortable with themselves not good enough for you? Why should anyone expect them to be something they aren’t? When you ask someone to do something, what’s the point in making them hate it in the process?

I don’t know, to me it’s disrespectful to expect someone to add to their bodies if it makes them uncomfortable. If they are happy with how they look naturally without a bunch of added crap, why make them uncomfortable and make them dislike the way they look? It just seems crazy to me.

But, I’m not your typical girl… I’m the girl you’re going to find on the gun range, out in a pasture, playing with a horse, swimming in a lake, kicking butt (or getting my butt kicked) during MMA, or out playing on a 4-wheeler… I don’t wear shorts, it’s a rare day to wear capris, I’m a boots, jeans, t-shirt and ball cap kind of girl and there’s a huge difference between when I feel forced to be a girl and when I WANT to be a girl… Just sayin.

Anyway, that’s my ranting for the night… Just something for consideration…

Have a good week,

Jessica

Offense

Our world is a funny place… It’s filled with people who have feelings, who have opinions, whether right or wrong, justified or not… It’s filled with people who are each having their own personal struggle, their own battle, their own fight, their own mountain to climb. I’m not going to argue that the world is full of a bunch of pansy people who get butt hurt over the craziest crap! But it’s also full of a lot of very honest and good people that make honest mistakes due to a situation.

Driving down the road and a man cuts you off, is it possible that they learned that their wife cheated on them today? Or yesterday?

A woman flies by you jumps in front of you and slows down, maybe she’s swerving around in her lane, is it possible that she’s got a small child in the backseat that is screaming at her? “Mommy! Look!” “Mommy! I need this!”

You see that person texting or talking on the phone, is it possible that they are dealing with a life or death situation and they are needing to get where they need to be?

Maybe you went to a restaurant and your waitress was in a crappy mood and was slow getting around to taking care of your table… Is it possible that she had issues at home came to work in a crummy mood and then had to deal with customers who were being rude because their food came out cold, or they didn’t get the right food/drink?

Maybe that punk kid who harassed you at school, maybe their dad ended up in jail for beating his mother, maybe that’s all he knows is yelling and bullying to get his way… Maybe his dad would beat his mother and his mother would take her aggression out on him? Maybe on another note, maybe there was a death in the family and he treats everyone around him like crap because he’s afraid of losing people. I’ve been there… I can speak on that one…

I could list a million scenarios but my point being, you don’t know what is going on in someone else’s mind. Again, are the actions right or wrong? Are they justifiable or not? Maybe, maybe not… Maybe not to you or me… But each person’s perspective is also their own reality. It’s their personal battle. Sure maybe it’s not as bad as what you or I went through, really though, who’s to say it’s not as bad? Who are we to discount what they may be going through? We struggle with our own problems knowing people or at least knowing of people who have had it WAY worse than we have, yeah?

And you might argue that not everyone is having a bad day and some people are just jerks. I’m not going to disagree with that. My point is more so that you don’t know what is going on… Some people are really good at hiding it until something sets them off, so even though it may seem like they are fine, it’s a good probability they are torn up inside.

As crazy as it may sound it’s important to have the self-control to show that person compassion anyway, despite their actions. Does that mean you need to be a doormat? No. Does it mean we are supposed to lie low and take it? No. Do we have a right to defend ourselves, our family, our home and so on? Heck yes!

But there’s a time to walk away, there’s a time to respond in love and there’s a time to meet their resistance.

If someone is calling out threats or names, which I’ve seen adults do and I think it’s rather amusing… It’s like giving a 5 year old foul language… You come up with some interesting comments! But maybe, they are climbing their mountain, maybe things have gone to pot and they’ve lost it. And maybe a rude comment from you sends them over the edge… You find out later down the road that they committed suicide. It goes back to the idea that maybe a kind gesture from you keeps someone from hurting themselves…

Proverbs 12: ¹⁸ There is one whose foolish words cut like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

Proverbs 15

1 A gentle answer turns away anger, but a sharp word causes anger.

² The tongue of the wise uses much learning in a good way, but the mouth of fools speaks in a foolish way.

⁴ A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but a sinful tongue crushes the spirit.

¹⁸ A man with a bad temper starts fights, but he who is slow to anger quiets fighting.

²⁸ The mind of the one who is right with God thinks about how to answer, but the mouth of the sinful pours out sinful things.

Proverbs 16: ²⁴ Pleasing words are like honey. They are sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.

Proverbs 18: ²¹ Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

There are so many verses dealing with this stuff, and if I were to list them all it would take a good couple hours to go through them. It’s just something extra to chew on.

Overall though, once you start adopting this mindset of being aware of what other people might be going through, it makes it a simple process to allowing other people’s junk to roll off your shoulders. As people, we like to complicate things more than necessary.

Our job biblically, is to love as Christ loves.

Our job as decent human beings is to be kind regardless, be respectful regardless, but know that line between being an outstanding person and not being a doormat, or a punching bag. There’s still a point to defend yourself. But don’t take offense to it, don’t allow it to make you angry and keep you there.

Having the ability to control how you allow other people to affect you makes all the difference. Is it hard? Heck yes! Do I have my own ability to control how I allow people to affect me? Sort of… It’s not perfect. However, despite how much I might try to place blame on someone for “making” me feel a certain way, reality is, a door was opened and it was my choice to walk through it and shut the door behind me.

We have to learn to not walk through that door. To know that we have the power to see that door, close it and walk away and not allow that room to become our prison. Not hold onto that offense or frustration.

Anyway, I’m done now…

God Bless,

Stay safe,

Jessica